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20% Hopeful

I keep telling myself, just be 20% hopeful. IUI has a success rate of around 20%. I'm trying to be realistic and not get my hopes up BUT it's is so FUGGIN' hard.

I'm on 13 dpiui/dpo (days past inter-uterine-insemination/days past ovulation). I do a beta test at the doctor's tomorrow at 7:40 am. I have resisted the urge to take an at home pregnancy test. The wait is driving me nuts. I just want to know already!!!!!!!!!!! If it didn't work at least I have closure and can move on. The damn anticipation.

I have mad watery discharge & cramps -- both unusual for me pre-period but it could be residual effects of the drugs. Who knows. I keep thinking my period is here, from the wet surge in my panties. I'm glad I have an office door b/c I keep looking at my panties.

I clearly have problems....