Hubby is agnostic at best. He has a lot of pride for his culture and looks upon Sikhism fondly. My MIL wigged out on us b/c I am not Sikh when I first got married. Hubby’s family has expectations that the child will be raised Sikh. I don’t feel comfortable even bringing up Church or Baptism around them.Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "I am not Latina": Hi ! I just found your blog (through your comment at Shauna's blog) and I am totally hooked. Your posts are really fun and interesting. I am bengali myself and live in SF area. I was wondering about the portuguese connection. I came across this wiki-entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christianity_in_Bangladesh
One question, how do you deal with the religion stuff within your family ? I am wondering because my hubby is catholic (from South India) and I am hindu. Things are cool now because we are both very liberal, but I am a tad bit worried that things might get complicated once I have a child.
-spee
My parents are Sunday Church-goers. My Dad is also a hippie-Bengali, which is very cool. They never cared about Hubby’s religion. I dated a white guy (my angst phase as he was anti-institution) for many years and they hated him with a passion, they were just happy I settled down with a desi. My parents *secretly* want Tubby to be Baptized and raised Catholic but they’re cool if I don’t.
Hubby and I decided the first month we were dating (we dated for one month and then eloped) that our child’s spirituality would be my domain. Easy, no? Hubby just doesn’t care about religion but supports my desires to raise our child a liberal Catholic as he even accompanies me to Church.
My in-laws are free to teach Tubby about Sikhism. My in-laws may not be happy but Tubby is not their child. While my in-laws are free to provide us their opinion on how Tubby should be raised, ultimately it is our decision. I personally believe it will be a good thing for Tubby to be exposed to different religions/ways of thinking. I have no fear that Tubby will be confused.
If my husband was a hard-core Sikh, I would raise my child under both faiths. We’d find a way to compromise. Religion/spirituality should only bring a couple closer!
4 comments:
Wow, my Bengali ex's parents flipped out that I was half-Sikh. Props to your parents in being open-minded :-).
I grew up with two religions in the house, as I think you know - my mom is Catholic and my father is Muslim. I was raised (unofficially) as a Catholic, since I was essentially raised by my mother. As I got older, I decided to become a practicing Muslim. I had issues growing up, feeling like I didn't belong to the Catholic church but being afraid of the Muslim mosque. I don't regret not formally choosing a religion at all, though. I feel more well-rounded in terms of religion and spirituality than I could've been with one strict religion. I think the biggest favor two parents of differing religious backgrounds can do for their child is to teach them about both and then let them choose one (or neither) when they are old enough to make the decision.
The funny thing is, people assume that growing up with parents of the same religion is easier, but many of us in that situation are just as confused. It's ok to be confused. It means you're questioning, and ultimately, that's a good thing, no?
Tubby is going to be so awesome. :)
Thanks Bengali Chick for highlighting and discussing this issue. Our decision is to expose the child (when it happens) to both religion and let them choose when they grow up but I was wondering how liberal (parents) catholics can be (like you discussed in one of your post).
I went through your blog yesterday (because I am killing some time in India right now). I could not help but empathize with so many of your posts. And yeah, your makeup notes are rather useful for me, because I have wheatish complexion as well ;)
Lastly, I am really interested in you 'manifestation of desire' idea. Do you kow any book regarding that ? My Dad has been telling that to me for sometime from his spiritual learnings and hubby has been propounding it as his professional mantra. And I want to re-start dreaming-wishing, something I had stopped doing.
-Spee
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