Thursday, April 18, 2013

This is what I do all day long...


I adore being a mommy.  The best decision to date was quitting my job spend more time with my family:)

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Posted by Oni at April 18, 2013 | | Comments

Thursday, April 10, 2008

It's Clear As Mud

Having children terrifies me. Right now life is pretty freaking awesome. I get to jet set around the world. If my husband is on a business trip, I can book a ticket and join him with no worries. If a friend invites me to an impromptu happy hour, I just need some lip gloss and I'm ready to go. More importantly, I can be completely and totally self-absorbed.

I absolutely adore my life in Los Angeles.

Kick ass husband -- Check
Kick ass friends -- Check
Kick ass social life -- Check

I can party like a rock star -- as evidenced from this pic last week at a party in the Hollywood Hills where I had a bit too much fun.

A baby will ruin my social life. I know this sounds so shallow. I know it does. But my social life is important to me. So much of my identity comes from work and my social circle. I'm terrified that I'm going to absolutely resent my children. My co-worker, who's 29, has 2 kids and she told me "I love my kids but I don't know if I should of have them. I'm envious of your life."

I like my freedom. I'm not done exploring, discovering and working on ME. Yes, ME ME ME b/c I am self-obsessed.

But. But. But. I know I'll want kids one day. And I have fertility issues. And my doctor has said thank gawd I'm trying now. But I think it would be better if I could wait until I was 35, maybe even 40!


Yeah, this is all clear as mud. Maybe I'm just selfish.

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Posted by Oni at April 10, 2008 | | Comments