Sex for sex's sake is deliciously orgasmic. This month we are off the ttc (trying to conceive) bandwagon as I must get my wisdom teeth pulled. Anesthesia and tubby don't mix well. It is so much easier to cum (4 times yesterday morning might I add) when I don't have to worry if my legs are propped back far enough, I'm in the best position to hold sperm, whether my cervical fluid is egg white consistency or decipher my temperature. It's honestly glorious. Liberating. Fun.
There's also no mystery sex with baby-making. Everything is planned, planned and planned. I had to catch my egg! Even when I planned to be laid back and not plan sex, that's bullsh*t, I still calculated my chances of pregnancy secretly. I would call poor hubby and scream, "You need to get home NOW. I NEED SPERM." Not very romantic, luckily hubby never seemed to mind. I analyzed everything hubby did and would say things like "don't do that - that won't make a baby" or "STOP - is that safe for tubby" or hubby's least favorite "no you're not getting head d*amnit, that's a waste of sperm." Mystery sex if far more appetizing especially with a little vino.*** I don't know where hubby is or what he's doing with his appendages, I just get to relax and enjoy the rolling orgasms. After mystery sex, I say things like, "I sure as hell don't know what you were doing and I don't care if it's legal, unf*ckingbelievable! Do it again! Do it again! Do me again!"
With all the fun I'm having, I'm not sure when I'll be ready for ttc sex, maybe never. Baby-making sex can go suck an egg, if it can ever catch one.
***A Bengali Chick public service announcement: Inebriation and sex are not a good thing, unless you're with a committed partner that you trust.
18 comments:
very funny! poor hubby and the lack of head in order to save sperm! yeah, i'd get off the TTC bandwagon for a bit and just relax and enjoy the mOOOHments. lucky you!
er, not being a health freak but if you're trying to conceive, should you be taking vino? i'm no doctor, you've researched all this stuff, so enlighten please.
also, thanks to your blog, i watched the secret. LOVED it.
I don't drink while TTC. My last cycle was ultra long and I was siked for my period to come so that I could finally enjoy a cocktail. I'm enjoying my vino now:)
That was hysterical! Especially the waste of sperm part. Poor hubby.
Good luck with the baby-making!
LOL! this brings me back to my TTC days...oh and the days of actually having sex.
must be nice, my dear. MUUUUUUST be nice. :)
seriously though. good for you! four orgasms? i haven't had that many in a row for years...without B.O.B. that is. hehe
GPG: No baby-making for now.. just sex. Thanks for the luck though. Catching an egg is tricky business.
Tiffany: Girl I don't know how you go w/o sex. You're seriously a trooper. Model Wife Award should go to you for your perseverance.
I think sex for sex's sake is how we ended up conceiving. We tried unsuccessfully for a few months and then stopped b/c I needed to intern at a law firm this summer and didn't want a due date b/w june and aug. We were using condoms and forgot once - 3 weeks later I had a positive test :)
The timing actually worked out perfectly and JP didn't have to listen to me talk about the best positions for conceptions (and btw, we def weren't in one of those positions that night, and I didn't lay there with my hips up in there air, or any of the other stuff I was doing while we were "trying" ;)
Does planned sex have to be so unromantic? We didn't do the ovulation temperature-checking thing... I was too lazy for that, so we figured if we did it every 48 hours that should be often enough to cover our bases and not too often to lower the sperm count. It was actually nice to be on a schedule and not have to think about it, just do it.
LL: Well I'm on a break for now, def. until the wisdom teeth are pulled. I'm glad the "non-planning" method worked for you, so nice and stress free!
CM: I don't think planned sex has to be unromantic. Sex with no goal but to orgasm is just much more romantic and fun for me.
good for you, BC. i concur that TTC sex is... very boring. it's about insemination, not satisfaction. and damnit-- it's hard to get yourself in the mood when you're thinking about timing, temperatures, and all that other TTC mumbo jumbo.
hell. sometimes a gal just needs a good fuck.
K n K: I like you. Right on.
Inebriation and sex are not a good thing, unless you're with a committed partner that you trust.
Yes they are! I don't trust most of the men I sleep with, but I have a whale of a time anyway.
Are you serious about the 4 orgasms? I find this hard to believe.
Roonie: This is one of the reasons I am madly in love with hubster. He does his research and type A personality in the bedroom is a plus.
Four orgasms in one night?! Either your hubby's talented on luck is on your side! I'm shaking my head in disbelief. I've heard so much about multiple orgasms...yet never experienced it. :/
Feather: When I have multiple orgasms, it's more like a crescendo effect, each orgasm stronger than the last. Here, I had 4 separate orgasms from various stimulations.
By the way, and i will write a post on this, for some period of time I thought orgasms were a myth (before hubby of coure).
I'm confused. I thought multiple orgasms was something that every woman experienced everytime they had sex. I've never had just one, except when I am partnerless. Usually, it's 5-10. I can't believe that some women don't get to experience that... How sad...
it will pass: all depends on how you define multiple orgasm.
and of course each women orgasms in very different ways.
Ok i dont want to get in the middle of all the baby makin stuff discussion between all these women but you are HILARIOUS! "head is a waste of sperm" genius i tell ya..poor him
Jeet: thanks. regarding head, my husband is happy we're not TTC and i'm not being a nazi over his spermies.
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